Kicking off 2010; Jeff, Marc, Karl, and Jamie threw down with one of the most original BMX Jams that I have ever been to. As most people in Ottawa know, Jeff has a bunch of ramps stowed away in his warehouse that have been used for a bunch of things already (backyard jam, ghetto street jam)… well this time the 39C boys decided to take things to a new level by placing the ramps smack dab in the middle of their living room. I wasn’t totally surprised when they announced their plans to do this, as anyone who knows them knows that they like to leave their living room as little as possible. Beers and C-gars on the couch all day. What DID surprise me was the amount of work they put in to make it happen, very out of character for Jeff especially.

The Jam attracted people from all over, in fact there were more people at the party that were from out of town than there were Ottawa locals. Fan favourites, Pat and Lelo showed up for the jam and partied hard all night. Riding wise, the ramps were owned all night by Greg and Dewey from MTL, Corey from Vancouver Island and our own Big Ben Kaufmann. It was seriously a pro demo in there. Greg was owning the quarter to sub, Corey put a hole in the roof trying a flair on a quarter that shouldn’t even be comfortable to air, and Dewey manning up a sick icepick 270 on the same ramp were all probably the most notable tricks I saw that night.

After the riding chilled out, everyone got serious about drinking. Andrew Grant chugged a bottle of wine and then he and a couple of others started jumping and hitting their heads in the ceiling fan… which eventually led to a high kick smashing out the ceiling fan… which eventually led to wrestling matches between the ramps where Karl Oxenlostthefight got owned by Andrew, and then we watched Jeff and Jamie square off in a ruthless sumo wrestle. During this sumo duke out, they each had a smoke in their mouth, and at one point Jamie had Jeff pinned to the ground while taking a drag of his cigarette and ashing all over Jeff’s chesty nipples.

Its events like this that make me excited to be part of the BMX community. Nobody has this much fun over the age of 15 but us. We may be acting like 15 year olds; wrecking a living room, drinking in a terribly irresponsible manner, smashing our heads into a ceiling fan and play wrestling in a super gay way… but it sure beats the alternative; being a douchebag fun hater. So next time you don’t show up to one of these events (thats right, i mean you) remember that someday you’re going to have smelly kids, a shitty job and a wife that gets saggier and less fertile every day and you’ll wish you could go back in time and enjoy your life before it started to suck*.

*this scenario excludes the exception of Roland who has a kid and a wife and still has more fun than any of us.

There is nothing quite like giving something your all and completely falling on your face. You know, like when you spend all year training really hard to win the big track and field meet only to show up and get murdered by all the kenyan kids with 6 foot long legs, or when you go into the exam and totally flunk it because you stayed up all night studying super hard for it, or when you ask out that super pretty girl and she turns out that you’re not nearly attractive enough. Failure is like fine wine; it’s bitter and if you sample enough of it eventually you get addicted.

I’m no prophet, but I predict doom for Markham’s new answer to the famous “Ray’s MTB”. This park, if you haven’t already heard about it, is a year round all bike training ground with all kinds of really cool ramps, all made out of a space age wood compound called “chip board”… I’m not a scientist or anything, so I couldn’t begin to explain to you how engineers have crafted this magical board for maximum strength and durability. Although I seem to remember how easily squirrels could bore through it and get into my cottage as a kid… before we changed the window shutters to ply wood… but again.. I’m neither a scientist or a carpenter so what do I know.

The park does look pretty fun, I’ll give it that. The ramps seem well shaped, and the little bits of video footage I’ve seen online show some pretty gnarly riding. However, despite their seductive shapes, I’m sure as soon as someone spills a gatorade on the ramps, that spongey wood will suck it all up and change forms dramatically. Perhaps a no water rule will be implemented, it seems that management has a hardon for ridiculous usage stipulations so anything is possible.

Of these stipulations, one is “No brakeless bikes” (as seen above). And this really makes me reflect upon the failures of EVERY SINGLE INDOOR PARK to open in ontario over the past decade. Every time they fold, and always because they can’t remain financially viable. Not enough clientelle. So obviously opening a new park in Markham, it makes sense to bar 70% of the BMX/MTB community’s riders from riding it. And not even that, all the pro riders in the Toronto area are brakeless. The most influential dudes in the area will never ride that park. Great choice guys! You’ve clearly thought this one through. If you should have banned anything it should be pegs, not even perfect brakes will stop pegs from making gnarly holes in all your chip board ramps.

Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a brake rider through and through. And truthfully I would really like to ride this park. However I can’t imagine when I’ll ever get the chance. The only guy I ride with that consistently has brakes is Jorden. And so on a roadtrip its not like he and I will go ride and all my other friends will sit out. Fuck no. We’re going to go someplace else.

I hate to wish failure upon these guys, they’ve publicly stated that they have invested their life savings in it, and I wish I could be optimistic about it but when you make such foolish decisions about the small details, I can only imagine what kind of boners they’re pulling on the big stuff.

I had a hell of a time making a best/worst list this year… because every time I thought of something noteable for either best or worst it always kind of straddled the line. So for that reason i’ve got the top ten moments of 2009 along with their pros and cons.

NOT SO METRO.

Pro: Super fun course, Ottawa guys all threw down with pretty good runs, getting drunk and heckling topped it all off and then the legendary dance cave! Rich and Jorden smashing soap dispensers two nights in a row, Harassing the dude working at pizza pizza, putting recycling boxes in the back of cabs, Rich letting the fire extinguisher off in the room… amazing ruthlessness

Con: Rich letting the fire extinguisher off in the room, ruining prashants camera and further damaging Jeff’s smoke ridden lungs.

HULL TRAILS

Pro: Having a new place to ride and seeing everyone come together in the spring to get shit built. Watching ginger do 540s over the dirt spine, Kyle and Greg Flag doings over unders on the jump/berm, actually seeing Chris Campbell come out (once… only once). Beers and trails in the morning before work… can’t wait for spring.

Con: Everyone losing interest in them by July. Having shitty mountain bikers steal the wood for the mini ramp to build big useless kickers, and cut the lips down with their dinnerplate sprockets.

TAZ FINALLY RE-OPENS

you'll never see this at Taz...

Pro: Having an amazing park only 2 hours away is a perfect winter road trip destination.

Con: As a result both South Parc and UAB will undoubtedly struggle. Although I could care less about slippery old south park, it WAS nice to ride once in a while and has now apparently been degraded to an almost ‘road warrior’ish post apocalyptic mess of wood and metal that threatens to envelop your bike with every landing. I’d hate for Taz to be the undoing of UAB though, because that place is more than a skatepark, its a legend.

HECKLING WHITTON @ The MACNEIL DEMO

cmon Ali, you gotta learn to take it if you're gonna make it!

Pro: It was really really really funny.

Con: Now everyone hates Ottawa.

Pro: Did I mention it was funny?

HATE THIS PREMIERE

Pro: Everyone getting together to get ruthless. Lelo and Pat at 39c getting their drunk on and the inevitable cockmaster show, The MTL/Ottawa hockey game, Jorden puking in a pizza pizza and passing out, only to wake up and get ruthless at zaphods and get drunk all over again only hours later.

Con: What a shitty video.

Pro: Rich being cool with heckling.

POOL SEASON

Pro: RIding fucking pools! Do I really need to explain this one? The abandoned pool we rode was my favorite, that or the prince of wales pool… or maybe the Andrew Grant II pool… fuck they were all great. I hear Jeff is already planning his upcoming pool season.

Con: Finding out first hand how retarded Ottawa Police are. (specifically the vanier police). Having him kick us out and tell us we’re lucky he doesn’t beat us up… I sure hope Rich can clean up the force when he gets in there…

TOMMY’S INJURY

Pro: (yup, there is a pro to this.) Having Tommy on the sidelines for a couple of months gives all of us old guys a chance for our egos to mend.

Con: Losing a staple rider in the scene always sucks. Having suffered a big injury myself at the same age when I tore my ACL, I know how much it sucks to have riding taken away from you. Its hard. But sticking with it through all that is what separates us all from the chumps who still wear skate shoes in university and buy skate/bike videos but haven’t touched a bike or board since they ‘rolled their ankle’ back when they were 16 doing something i’m sure they’d describe as super gnarly but is definitely a lie.

39C JAM

Pro: Awesome day of riding on some sketchy ramps. Eating meat, drinking beers, having laughs and getting ruthless.

Con: Kind of a meagre turnout. Lots of riders didn’t bother to show. This isn’t especially a bummer, but definitely a sign that the Ottawa scene is not as tight as it used to be.

MACNEIL DEMO

Pro: Having a reason to go to CP and drink beers and ride.

Con: The demo sucked. Alistair can’t air as high as ted in the 7 foot, and thought we’d be impressed by his feeble stalls… the only good thing to go down was that 3flip to fakie that dude was doing with no shirt on. Macneil needs to sponsor good riders, drop Ali and Silva and pick up Ben already.

Con: Cory Beal. Just kidding dude, I know you have the internet hardwired into your brain and that you’d see this. At least I spelled your name right!

CHRIS BRYAN’S BRUSH WITH DEATH

Con: Watching a good friend lose half his face and start twitching is pretty terrible. As bad as this was for us to see, I can only imagine how shitty it was for Chris to deal with.

Pro: I learned a valuable lesson; gingers unlike zombies can survive a direct blow to the head. Evidently our only weapon against them is sunlight…

ALSO. I have the best and worst of the Gay. Because BMX always has a little gay in it…

BEST.

WORST.

ALL THE BEST FOR 2010!

Roland Labrecque Real Dad

Best
1. Finding a new gear. Mo faster.
2. Woodward trip.
3. Actually learning tricks not just doing them. (Read dialing them in …3)

Worst
1. Ottawa taking a hit as a fun place to BMX. The hate is funny when you are in on the joke but not at all otherwise.
2. BMX event =drunk.
3. Having your son tell you to go ride by yourself because he doesn’t feel like it. Is it just me? LOL

Tommy Hains Young Buck

Best
1. Ben Kaufmann’s crazy web video!
2. 39C-gar jam with a pretty sweet quarry session and Andrew Grant getting violated
3. People getting together to raise money for a box jump at Orleans park
4. Having Claude the molester as a coworker and Crazy Fucking Steve as a boss
5. Gatorade G2

Worst
1. Not going out to ride street as much as I should have
2. Jeremy Mendoer’s red jeans
3. Getting flats when you don’t have a spare tube because you gave yours to emo Josh and he’s too lazy to get you a new one (you still owe me!)

Jeremy Deme Ten Pack/Presence

Best
1. Luke Santucci’s first night out in Montreal/ prank phone call/ park brawl/ black eye/ drunken bike ride home
2. Presence Premiere/ Drunk in snow banks
3. Boston Vacation
4. 3L bottle of Appleton and all the good times that came with it
5. Vancouver/driving across Canada

Worst
1. Montreal rain summer
2. Dill’s farts
3. November in Vancouver, 30 days of rain
4. Hemsky getting injured
5. Hoder in jail

Rich Redmond Hate This

Best
1. 39C made it across Canada on a C-Gar roadtrip, a little bit of biking broke out here and there it would seem.
2. 39C puts together the warehouse Jam. All around good stuff and effort.
3. Orleans Fundaraiser jams, both succesful and fun in my opinion. Thanks to some great helping hands and riders actually showing up. I am proud of myself and the scene.
4. Also really proud of the far too long Hate This release. Pumped on myself once again.
5. Woodward trip – Short but wicked, especially when Roland is back on a bike killing it.
6. Learning new tricks. Never unhappy with that. Every year passes and I am convinced I hate met a wall in terms of learning new tricks and abilities. This is never the case and another year has passed with many tricks done. Other people never seem to stop progressing except for Jeff. He stuck with his same self from year 2000.
7. Ben Kaufmann is back in Ottawa and put us on the map for killing it an being a super pro. Yah Benny. Try not to fall with me dangling off your nuts.
8. Tommy is repaired?
9. Max Vincent finally makes his presence truly felt in Eastern Canada. And even then he was still pussy footing. Good job to Moxley for 2nd place of course. Taz contest.
10. Jorden replies to Chris’s 16mm film with his own version in Hi8 called “for sure”
11. Trails are alive and will probably have a good future until the death of the property.
12. Cockmaster stories are always fun

Worst
1. People come and go and unfortunately it’s never a really nice thing. Although I was super happy that one year when Underbite left Ottawa. That kid that used to train under Todd’s (Ted’s dickhead alter ego) regime was annoying too. Miss ya Ted.
2. Tommy has random crazy orgasms and can’t bike for a large part of the year. Big time Bummer.
3. People (Jorden) are always hurt or working. Especially the proles that work 9-5 mon-fri. Get a life, you wanna bmx?, you have to have wierd jobs people!
4. C-gars past the point of comedy.
5. Charlie still rides a MTB.
6. Ottawa is full of talkers and not nearly as many doers.
7. Ottawa trails are not nearly as fun as the Sudbury ones.
8. Jeff owes me money and this can be on his worst list cuz I ain’t paying him for the hair bet. Fuck You!

Jorden Guth Coma

Best
1. White Water Rafting, Bungee Jumping and Sky Diving! FUCKING EPIC!
2. Hate This premiere and all the partying surrounding it
3. Not-so-Metro weekend! RUTHLESSSSSSSS!! And somehow not getting arrested through everything
4. Leaving Kyle on the bus after a night of drinking only to have him chasing after my truck about 30 minutes later after he woke up and had to cab back to 39c from Barrhaven
5. Trails,road trips, the 39c jam, Finding/riding the GT ramp, pool riding, and pool hoping. Good times

Worst
1. Tommy having to take some time off riding
2. Knee Problems for a bunch of different people
3. Not going on the Vancouver road trip
4. The extremely unhealthy amount of smoking going on
5. No overseas traveling
6. Pissing leland off after he gave us a place to stay

Kyle Lafleur 39C Alumni

Best
1. Living at 39C: So many funny time, good nights of drinking, Jeff being a jackass, Boudreau being a loud mouth hard ass. Drinking all of Karls beer. All the challenge’s that happened and all the ones I failed at. Having ramps in the garage, main entrance and backyard was pretty awesome. Fuck 206 and what they call a “BMX” house. The 39C jam was a good time, it was nice to ride those ramps out of our yard. Not to metion Jeffs mission for pools in the spring was pretty fun, I never rode pools before but that guy got me hooked. It was nice to do much more then just riding as Sudbury doesn’t always have that option. White water rafting, bungee jumping and sky diving are things that I will never forget and really want to do again. All though it was a riding trip the trip to Vancouver was absolutly epic. We rode a bunch but we also did a bunch of other awesome stuff…camping in the rockies, zip lining, gondola rides, good beer and just being in Vancouver in general was a highlight of the year “For Sure”. BOUDREAU: “Thats a for sure”. There was also plenty of trips to Montreal and other local parks, a few local camping trips, a party with some trains. All in all we made a loy of shit happen for being as lazy and useless as we can be.
2. $120.00 in empties in about 3 1/2 months. Must of been some good some good nights of drinking
3. Weeks with Andrew Gobbo, that dude is something else and will definitely give you a different out look on life. Most straight edge dude I know but always wants to party. Theres always a party in his head. If you ever want the best pizza in Vancouver just get in touch with this man, he’ll gladly go for a slice.
4. Dead bone in my wrist: I’m trying to look on the positive side of the injury. Riding with this injury cause me to progress in a different direction this summer, dial in some tricks I wouldn’t have ever dialed it had my wrist been good and learned a lot of fun nib jib tricks I may have never learned. It wasn’t the best thing but I still had fun and it could have been worse.
5. Tommy Hains: This kid has had some major problems this year, about 8 seizures and being diagnosed as being Epileptic, and has been kept inside off his bike and out of school for the last 3 – 4 months. We all know Tommy loves nothing more then to ride his bike.

Worst
1. Living at 39C: Theres always another side to the story. Despite having done all that this summer 39Classy wasn’t always the best place to be. I learned to drink A LOT (Not sure if that goes in with the good or the bad). The motivation in that house most days was slim to none, especially if we were trying to get riding or anything happening in Ottawa, calling people to ride was a chore. If we wanted to do a day trip somewhere there would be a little more motivation but calling people was still a chore, there would usually be enough people in the house for a trip and we’d leave everyone else hanging dry. The house got damn dirty…5 bmxers (9 Bikes), people always over and the guy on the couch. The bathrooms were something else at times. That place gets hot as hell in the summer…and we didn’t even really have a summer this year. Shit talk about building a snow bike is going to go on and on like the song that never ends. Lets not even talk about fruit flys and god dammit Jeff get a hair cut and take a shower.
2. $120.00 in empties in about 3 1/2 months. Were all border line alcoholics.
3. 3 weeks with Andrew Gobbo. Again the dude is rad, but having never met him before this and having no idea what I was getting in to. The guy is all over the map and you never know what he’s got coming next. I’m not saying it was a terrible 3 weeks but i’ll just be more prepared next time.
4. Dead bone in my wrist: Despite still having fun this summer, I didn’t progress the way I wanted to. I didn’t ride as much/hard because of it and sometimes sitting at a spot wanting to do a trick I know would hurt like hell if I did it almost killed me at times. Going full blast at woodward wasn’t an option and doing lots of barspins wasn’t an option. God damn I miss barspins.
5. Tommy Hains: He’s starting to get better, he’s on medication and will be taking a few courses in school next semester. Hopefully he can join us all in the spring when riding starts up again. Get well Tommy.

Dr. Wade Nelson BMX Veteran

Best:
1. Going to California: Back in the late winter, I got to go to the invite-only Old-School Reunion at Woodward West. While I was there, I got to ride with my old heroes from the 1980s, and many friends that I met during the 1990s. Very cool. Chatting with Eddie Fiola, Brian Blyther, Mike Dominguez, Dave Voelker, and too many more to list. At the big party, Stefan Prantl (founder of We The People) introduced me to Bob Haro and told him that I had done my Ph.D. on BMX freestyle. Bob was psyched, and we chatted for 40 minutes. Awesome. An audience with the pope.
2. Milestone: This has been my 30th year BMXing. Yup, got my first bicycle motocross bike in 1980. Take it.
3. Mags: Ron Wilkerson had graphite Skyway Tuff Wheels made for his 25th Anniversary Pork bike with a cassette hub which is compatible with Odyssey / Joytech parts. So now you can run micro-gearing with stiff, sealed bearing mag wheels. That is, if you buy the whole bike. Ron hooked me up with a set without the bike, however. That’s right, I’m rocking mags for 2010. They are heavier than my spoked wheels, yes, and you can’t run foldable tires on them because they don’t have a bead / groove to hold the tires in place, but they sure look cool.
4. Chrome: I’m psyched to be on Kink frames now. Zack is an old friend, and he gave me a great deal on chrome and a white 20” frames (Farside / Doyle). I also am rocking chrome bars, and Profile has helped me out with two pair of chrome cranks. Chris at Core here in Toronto is getting a pair of 990 forks chromed for me, too. Retiring the P.K. Ripper.
5. Living with Harley: Lots of BMX and guitars at our place. Six bikes, about 20 guitars.
6. My interview in Momentum magazine
7. Book: I have a book contract with a publisher in the states. Guess the subject matter.

Worst:
1. Being kicked out of BMX three times this year: no details permitted.
2. Bob Haro may be offended: I sent him a copy of my Ph.D., and I’m worried he doesn’t like this one section.
3. Two trips to the ER this year for stitches: One set of three to the knee, another set of three to the face. Much damage caused by the 20” this year. Wait – the face stitches were actually from trying flail boomerangs in the dark on my commuter bike!
3. KHE Anchor bars: Second worst product fail for me in 30 years. Flexed sideways about two inches. Returned to Kink Badger bars. Worst: I tried Odyssey Twisted PC pedals back in the mid 1990s (1996?), and one snapped in half in 20 minutes.
4. Eclat brake levers: Third worst fail. The pins in the hinges bent on installation. Garbage. Returned to Tech 77s.
5. BMX Freestyle: Just continually bummed that we have let the big corporations buy their way in to BMX. This is a generational thing. Fifteen years ago we resisted. A company is not cool because they buy their way in. Conversely, I think that some of the rider-owned companies have blown it, too. Fashion over function, marketing over design, new colour-ways instead of new products. You are a BMXer because you ride, not because you consume BMX products.
6. I’m getting old: I can’t relate to the youngsters anymore. See above. Everyone should have to quit BMX by 21 years old. 38 year olds complaining about what 15 year olds are doing for fun is just silly.
7. Didn’t learn tailwhips for the 30th year in a row.

Harley Haskett Ten Pack/Rad Dude

Best:
1. Re-session Tour – The Re-session Tour was definitely one of the best parts of 2009 for me. I had the chance to roll through so many cities between Montreal and Vancouver, got to spend a lot of time with some great people, meet new friends, and just have fun riding bikes. Seeing Greg Flag check his ‘wrist watch’ on dancefloors from Montreal to Kelowna never got old!
2. Cliff Jumping – This one is pretty much self-explanatory because cliff jumping is amazing no matter what and 2009 saw a lot of it. The quarry in Ottawa is one of the best places ever and seeing Chris Martindale throw some of the most amazing looking gayners off of the cliff was nothing short of impressive. In Penticton I saw Dirty Dillon Lloyd toss the slowest fronties off of one of the biggest cliffs I’ve jumped off. I’m pretty sure cliff jumping will be on my ‘Best/Worst Of’ lists for a long time!
3. Good People – This is a personal thing for sure but 2009 was a great year for spending time with, being involved in great things with, or just meeting some amazing people. From all of the traveling I did, to playing music, to just hanging out and getting wild, this past year was filled with some genuinely righteous people. Except Dillon Lloyd of course, that kid’s a shithead! Haha!

Worst:
1. Falling hats – I’ve taken a bit of heat for my stance on this one, and it’s definitely not something new for 2009 but I’ve noticed it WAY too much this year. As far as I’m concerned, if your crisp New Era hat or saggy beanie gets tossed off of your head while you spin down that 5 set, it doesn’t count. If I were a TM I’d make someone re-film the clip with either no hat or one that’s 1/8″ smaller. Seriously, the majority of Stay Fit didn’t count in my opinion…
2. Turndowns on street – This is definitely not a new phenomenon for 2009, I’ve just noticed them a lot more this year, and noticed how much I want to vomit every time I see one. Sure, there are dudes out there who can click them on street, and that’s all well and good. However, if the options are a letdown on an 8 set or a proper turndown over a nice set of doubles, I’ll take the latter, thank you very much!
3. Anonymous – I don’t really know who this dude is but he’s pissed a lot of people off in 2009. According to message boards and blog comments (not just within BMX), the guy doesn’t like anything at all! Seriously, if you have something to say, grow a set and put your name to it. I’ll respect someone a thousand times over if they’re not afraid to speak their mind without the use of a pseudonym.

Brandon Lalonde Enthusiastic Amateur

Best:
1. Pepsi contest at Taz. Contests are always fun, especially when it motivates people to try new/amazing tricks.
2. Orleans boxjump fundraisers (race and orleans jam). Both occasions were amazing times. I hope these kind of events become a regular occurance in Ottawa. Thanks Rich, Chris, Tommy, Steve, and anyone else who helped out.
3. Roadtrips! This year I was able to go to X-dreams (RIP) and woodward. BMX is all about having a great time with your friends.
4. Trails! The local trails got a huge facelift this year, thanks to a number of people. I am looking forward to getting back there in the spring and making them even better.
5. Pools. Enough said.

Worst:
1. MTB’s still trying to BMX. Just switch already. No brakes+no shocks+big wheels = gayer than eating semen on your morning cereal.
2. Watching a friend go through an injury/illness is always tough. This year Tommy had a rough ride. He is such a great friend and rider… we are all looking forward to riding with you again Tommy!

Jose Bray Joe Mamma

Best:
1. New Bigger Store!
2. New Pup (Hunter)
3. Friends help!
4. Re-session Tour
5. Steamwhistle sponsoring Joe Mamma Move!
6. Better completes/lower prices!
7. Prashant/Jay/Anne-Marie/Eric/Cameron/Ben/Matt/Tom/Ryan – Aka Joe Mamma Staff!
8. Ottawa riders killing it
9. My wife still putting up with me
10. Most important – Ottawa Bmx community support!

Worst:
1. Maillot passing – RIP
2. Having to find a new location
3. Not enough riding
4. Mtb movies that are still trying to be BMX

Prashant Gopal Yo, Sick

Best:
1. Yo, Sick – After always thinking of making one, I finally stopped procrastinating and started making my own zine, and successfully put out one a season. As an evolving work in progress, I hope to do some bigger and better things with Yo, Sick in the new year.
2. Community Events – One of the best things about the scene we have in Ottawa are the community events we put on. Hate This premiere, Capital Cup, 39C BBQ Jam, Orleans Jam, Race Night, Halloween Jam. 2009 had plenty of great events that showcased riding, raised funds, and brought lots of people in the community out and embodied the DIY spirit of the scene.
3. Spots – This year was amazing for finding, discovering, and riding spots in Ottawa. Countless pools discovered by Jeff and drained with the help of lots of people. A certain water park that barged and slides and tunnels ridden. Secret rock trannies. A barrier that was quick-creted. Spots all over Ottawa and Hull that were discovered and sessioned. Hopefully this spirit carries on to 2010 and skateparks don’t remain as the status quo of riding in Ottawa.

Worst:
1. Injuries – 2009 saw some pretty serious injuries from people in our own scene. Chris Bryan’s extremely scary head injury, as well as Tommy Hains’ condition. It’s never fun to see your friends in rough shape, and is a reminder to how vulnerable we all are.
2. Time – There never seems to be enough of it when you have lots to do, and too much of it when you don’t have much going on. In hindsight there are always things I wish I had done more off, and done less of in the last year.
3. Always being the last to finish these lists.

Roland is a Superman.

Well, I’m not even going to try and compete with Roland’s narrative of the weekend… but here are a couple of visual examples to accompany his story.

Rich footjam whip

Fine piece of injured Ace.

Kyle with a big lookback transfer.

Jay wallriding the red bull wall.

Kyle Wheeljam on the 2nd sub up.

Kyle ruling the hip. 270.

Roland, amazing handplant over the sub.

Click below to read the conclusion to Roland’s Woodward experience, and soak in the wise words of a Real Dad.

Foreword: A lot of sessions happened in a short period of time and they kind of blend. I’ve tried to get stuff in the right order but forgive me if some of it isn’t quite right. Call it poetic license….

Day 2 – Reinforcement Day

Parenthood shapes you in many ways. Most are positive but… despite a full day of traveling and riding the day before, not really sleeping well, and the fact that I could definitely use a few extra hours of shut eye, sleeping in just wasn’t going to happen. 8:00am is about as good as it gets. Oh well. Hmmm…what to do today? Lets see…some of the most iconic, and best parks anywhere await. 9:00am to 11:00pm wow. I guess I better pace myself.

My first step out of bed lays out an early path for me. In one of my last few runs the day before I sprained my ankle. Nothing too serious but with two days of riding left I better do what I can. After making myself reasonably presentable its off to the lobby to find some breakfast, some ice for my foot, and something other than Gatorade to wash back some Ibuprofen.

9:00am rolls around quickly. Of course none of the rest of the crew are even remotely conscious but the parks are open!

I had planned all along to wait for the reinforcements (Rich, Brandon, and Jay) to arrive around 2:00 before getting things going. I mean riding for 13 hours is just not an option so this idea made a lot of sense. Might as well wait to ride with my buddies. Still… I spent some time contemplating the absurdity of the situation. Namely, being within 300ft of 3 great parks and choosing not to ride… Anyone who knows me, knows that when it comes to riding I don’t stop…maybe even can’t stop. In a move that is totally out of character for me though, I do the right thing.

It really was a beautiful morning with not to many more like it left in 2009. The leaves were mostly gone, but the sun was shining, and the hills were still green so I went for a walk. I wandered towards the X-games bmx downhill track. This thing is unbelievable. Its all grown over and it took me a while to figure it out because the gaps are impossible. Next I followed the signs to the ropes course which is in valley with a small creek running through it. The ropes course looks like fun but what really got my attention was the mega-ramp set-up. This is for training and is much smaller than the competition ramps used at X-games…but damn! I stood at the top for quite a while just trying to come to grips with the idea of rolling in never mind hitting the 10+ ft lip at the bottom. Freaky. (http://www.zapiks.com/le-vrai-premier-double-front.html
). Hidden over another small hill I found a competition style dirt jump set-up…this place just keeps going!

I headed back to the lodge to see if the guys were up and get some more ice. The lodge is actually a really nice place.The main focus of the area seems to be farming, purveying radness, and Penn State University. This happened to be the weekend of the big Penn State vs Ohio football game. As a consequence many of the guests were a little confused as to why a group of mostly grown Canadian men would drive 8hrs to ride little kids bikes and we were a little confused by the idea of a tailgating grill (http://www.topoftheline-travel.com/trailer-hitch-grill.html). I really enjoyed the conversations and atmosphere though and I learned a lot about the differences between my Canadian University experiences and the US experience.

Yep I was still stalling before hitting the parks…

I even went for a little nap. At about 1:00pm I decided it was time. A quick lunch of left over pizza and some scrounging for some tape for my ankle and I geared up…nothing worse than starting with a sweaty helmet. When I got to Lot 8 I was surprised to see that Rich, Brandon, and Jay were already there and going strong. The first thing I saw though was Chris going for flairs from quarter to bank over the 4ft gap. Really, really close. With a full compliment of guys it was really hard to keep track of things but some of the cool stuff I saw was Kyle doing lines through the bowled corner wall area and bar spinning the gap. There was also lots of foam pit shenanigans. It seemed to take forever for me to get going but my ankle finally loosened up. For the most part I just rolled around and tried to figure out how to get over the box in the center with some speed. I spent some time trying to figure out some kind of nosepick-wall runningman-decade-540 thing which didn’t pan out but not for lack of trying. Then, I tried to get smoothly into the corner pocket bowl, and fired out the high speed wall transfer, and gap to the quarter on the bowl deck from the day before. Not clean but getting there.

Later we headed back to Cloud 9. Most of us were hitting up the foam/resi area and a flurry of foam flairs was thrown with Chris, Jorden, Chris, Jay, Rich, and Brandon getting in on the action. There was some good attempts and some not so good ones. My favorite was when Brandon ended 4ft up, with his back flat against the wall, his knees bent as if he were sitting in a chair and totally upside down. Watching Kyle try to flip into the foam was also entertaining. Chris was throwing flip attempts over the spine resi which looked really do-able for him. After a while Jorden took his flair attempts over to the vert resi and the rest of us slowly migrated over. He had his usual amount of good luck. In sliding out of one attempt he managed to get his arm caught in a bubble at one of the seams. lt looked like it hurt a bunch but it could have been so much worse. Gruesome. Chris also took a pretty good slam trying to flair transfer from the mini to the vert resi.

One of the treats of the evening though was watching Jay play on the monster vert ramp. He just looked so natural which isn’t easy to do on 13.5 ft ramp. He also landed a flair on the resi. The first one rolled away from all weekend!

I spent a lot of time on top of the vert resi contemplating doing flairs. It didn’t really scare me but for some reason I just didn’t do it…I must be getting soft.

From the vert ramp things moved to the Cloud 9 mini which is as close to a perfect ramp as you’re going to find. We had a good session with pretty much the whole crew getting in on it. At first I was having a hell of a time just getting over the spine without hanging up…spines are my personal nemesis. After Rich gave me some really obvious advice, something along the lines of “You have to jump over it…” I actually started to figure it out and even enjoyed going over. Never thought I’d say that. I ended my mini session by scaring the hell out of myself on a 360 nose pick to loop out though. I’m a little embarrassed by my helmet and bike throwing afterwards. I don’t often react that way but I was just so mad at myself because I almost ended my weekend right there. Time to take a break and get some supper.

Refueled slightly with leftover pizza and free Matador snack sticks, eyes starting to look jaundiced from too much gatorade, and totally exhausted it was time for a mellow session to wrap up day 2. Lot 8, one of the most fun set-ups I’ve ever ridden, awaits. I was really too pooped to party and just nibbled around while, around me, things started to escalate. Lots of guys got in on working over the big Red Bull wall ride which was a treat to watch. Several off us spent some time trying to film some nibbles on the small center box. I got an opposite 360 on, to 360 nose pick off and also did a nothing on, to 360 nose off that I was happy with. Watching Rich rule the box/large quarter section was awesome. One of my favorite moments was when he gave whoever it was on the deck extreme Raditude in the middle of boosting large. That quarter is no joke…at least to the rest of us. I also really enjoyed watching Brandon ride the park. We all know that he is a tail whipping trick machine but he was doing some great lines with power and style. It was kind of an eye opener. I was still dogging it but time was getting short so decided I’d start pedaling and see if I could get a few things done. After a few attempts I finally got the transfer into the bowl deck quarter done proper. Yeah!

It seems that when some of the guys visited woodward the previous year they called out a hand-plant transfer line for me. Time to get it done. I’ve not really played on sub boxes too much and was a little worried that I wouldn’t have enough space to get up and over like I needed too. One of the things I’ve finally learned though is: when in doubt add a crank or two it and it served me well. First try was pretty close. I just needed to clean up a few details (squeeze my feet and pop with my hand). 3 or 4 more tries and it was done. I was pretty stoked but it was really only the first step. What I really wanted, was to do it over the gap. Time to add a few more cranks.

With my first try I just wanted to make sure that I got my hand on good and proper, had the gap under control, and just make it over the wall. It went well but, just like I thought, it was going to be tough to pull back into the bank. The only way I could think off was to get really inverted so my weight would be up instead of out over the wall. I took several runs at it and was getting closer. On one attempt I finally got my weight in but forgot the bike which went flying and bouncing around like they sometime do when granted a little freedom. Ok so weight in…check. Next I just have to worry about keeping the bike with me on the next try. I grabbed my bike, ready to finish it, but its a bad sign when your cranks won’t clear your chainstays. Bent cranks…great.

A quick check with the boys turned up a spare crank arm (Thanks Kyle!) but it would have to wait for Sunday. Time for some more ice, some more beer, and some more time in the hot tub.

Sunday morning rolled around. Another beautiful sunny morning…but who cares! Time is starting to get short so nobody wastes too much time getting ready. I taped up the bum ankle and made it to Lot 8 at around 10:00am. I have some plans to get some things done but we need to warm up first. A bunch of us painted the side of the small center box (driveway?) black with lip slide tire rubber. This session went on quite a while with some good stuff going down and captured on film. The highlight of this small session and of the whole day was Jeff getting an incredible lip-slide to foot jam 360 nose-pick done. He also was getting in to hang 5s pretty consistently. So good. Meanwhile… While we were all busy nibbling on this small stuff Jay was waging an epic solo battle with the elusive flair on the 9ft half. It was crazy we would catch glimpses of him between the ramps. I was pretty tired and need to void some gatorade so I made my way back to the lodge for a few minutes before gearing back up. When I got back to Lot 8 I was a little surprised to see guys pushing it so hard. We still had 2 hours but Jorden and Jay were punishing themselves trying to land flairs on real ramps. What’s going on its still a little too early for that… Unfortunately I misread the small print. The park closes an Noon not 2:00pm! A quick time check revealed 11:59am. Shit!

Ah well maybe It was better I left some stuff for next time. We went and geared down and took the bikes apart. Time to head out…Of course some of the guys were strangely missing. On the way out we found them sessioning one of the other outdoor parks . The fact that Chris and I even considered unloading the car and putting our bikes back together even though we had just ridden for 3 days straight and we expected the session to get shut down any minute is a true testament to…well I don’t know exactly what its a testament to but…

Bike Riding is Fun!

A few final thoughts:

What a great weekend on so many levels. I love my life but I often find myself a little jealous of the young guys when they post stories of their road trips. Its just not something my responsibilities allow me to do very often (Thanks Shelley for making this one possible!).

Woodward itself was awesome and so well done. I must admit though, at first I was a little underwhelmed, mostly due to skewed expectations. I mean the ramps just all seemed bigger in all the footage I’ve seen. Still the real power of the place is that there is just so many to choose from.

I finally spent a weekend at Woodward and only learned 1 new trick…namely lip-slides which I could learn anywhere. Weird.

I’m a little pissed off that I got my wires crossed and didn’t get a chance to go back and try some of the stuff I had in mind on sunday. I guess that just leaves some stuff or next time!

Start planning for early November 2010. Roland’s 40th birtday weekend at woodard!!! Everyone invited.

Cheers,
Roland

Roland already posted this on the message board, but it’s a great read and I didn’t want it lost in a sea of posts in a week and bumped off the page, so I’m re-posting it here. Stay tuned for Day 2. Take the time to read some inspiring words from this Ottawa BMX veteran on his long quest to ride Woodward.

This was a long time coming. I think I first saw adds for Woodward around 1989 in the BMX magazines and have been wanting to go ever since. Over the last several years I’ve tried a few times to get there without success. A few years ago my sweet wife even bought gift certificates to take me and we booked a date. Unfortunately I got injured and we had to cancel. I don’t even remember what the injury was but by the time it healed summer came around and I decided to wait until another cold season. Again though things didn’t go as planned…

That summer I got hurt pretty bad. Bad enough to not only affect my riding but my lively hood, my ability to be a good father, and a good husband. Anyone who has had a long term injury knows how tough it can be. I’ve had other injuries where I thought I may never ride again but this was worse. I was pretty sure I would never ride again and while I found that difficult I was more worried that I wouldn’t event be able to take my son to a movie. So…I put my Woodward gift certificates up for sale and I thought that dream had passed.

Thankfully, time takes care of a lot of things. I’ve since made a full  recovery and had a chance to follow some other dreams. Riding, while still a passion of mine, has a much different flavor and feel. I am still hardwired with a drive to push things and progress but I tend to direct it along different, less dangerous paths.

So when the latest call to the BMX mecca came I was shocked at my apathy. I kind of  wanted to go but it wasn’t with the same driving need I’ve had in the past. Based on tired old man thinking (long drive, away from my family, ….) I actually had decided not go. Thankfully Shelley reminded me of how we want to live. Namely, life is short, make it count, follow your dreams small or large. Ok sign me up! Even after paying though I had to choose again. The friday before we were to leave I was offered a pretty good work assignment which would have sent me to San Fransisco for the week. I chose Woodward again but this time my wife thought I was crazy to turn down a trip to California LOL. Then I got really sick and thought I might have to cancel again. Shelley even mentioned that I must have some sort of Woodward curse. For 3 days I forced myself to sleep, popped lots of cold fx and vitamin C and hoped. When Thursday finally rolled around I declared myself ready to go and hoped it was true!

Finally after a long drive, a night in hotel, an epically long wait for food at a Denny’s, and a Wal-Mart shopping spree we were at the gate. Yes Roland has arrived. I was kind of hoping for trumpets or something…oh well. We checked in (really nice digs) and got ready to ride. I forced myself to take as much time as possible to get ready. Two reasons. The first was that I knew there was a lot of riding ahead and the second and more important was that I was vibrating I was so excited and didn’t think I’d actually be able to ride that way! I rode around all the outdoor parks to check them out than walked all the indoor parks. It didn’t work. I was still vibrating but I wasn’t there to check out the PA countryside, beautiful as it is, so I joined the boys in lot 8 and dropped in. I wish I could tell you what happened next was some epic riding because it would make a better story but, well, that didn’t happen. I did find a gear I hadn’t used in a while though and managed to get a high speed wall ride thing done and worked on a high speed transfer to a small ramp on the deck of the bowl. Enough to leave me grinning and feeling 30 again!

Time for a break. Chris, Jorden, and I left Lot 8 to go find some food. I don’t remember the name of the pizza place in the little town but the food was amazing. Next mission, beer. We headed up the street to the “hole in the wall” bar. Classic. The best was watching the old surly local guy declare himself liquor inspector and take Jorden’s id. After he finally figured out the date he pronounced  “…yure lucky…”. The whole time Jorden was awkwardly smiling and bobbing his head waiting for the guy to smile and say he was kidding. Instead when asked: “…I don joke”. Too funny. My turn to buy beer. Been a while since I got carded. Once the formerly surly fellow and his friendly partner figured out how old I was they decided that I should probably be staying in the local cemetery instead of Woodward. They also added that I should have been there for Halloween because that is when the graveyard parties the hardest…

Sooo…. back to Woodward with beer in hand and stinking like smoke an stale beer.

After dinner we geared up and headed to the Playground. Weird little setups but some cool stuff to ride. Kyle was working over a multi-step sub setup, Ace slammed hard trying to log some clips, Jorden was doing lip slides and grinning ear to ear, and I jumped through a wall of foam bricks which sounds much cooler than it was. We finally decided to get out of there because we were all getting beat down by all these tiny ramps. Funny how that works. So we moved on to Cloud Nine and the LARGE foam pit/resi area. This is where the theme of the weekend really took hold with Chris and Jorden starting the quest for flairs into the end of the foam pit. By the end of the night Chris was getting them pretty decent into the foam and I was hoping Jorden wouldn’t try it on a real ramp (sorry Jorden but its true).

Other cool stuff included Chris throwing easy double flips, and other flip variations into the foam and Kyle was doing multi bar spins variations on the resi. For the most part I stayed away from the foam because it is just too exhausting but i did throw one back flip in there and also discovered that I could to front flips if I wanted too. I  landed tires on my first try…cool but not going to happen. I spent most of the night re-learning nothings and supermans on the resi and the last hour was seriously some of the most fun I’ve ever had on my bike. I’ve never charged anything like that before….so much fun. I was going way too fast (well maybe not) but if you could have still framed my face you would have seen me grinning at the thought of pedaling as fast as I have in years towards a monster 6ft lip. Time for some ice, a shower, a few beers in the hot tub. Totally satisfied. Time to get ready for day 2.

- Roland Labreque

photo by Mike Cardin.

First off, your name, age, location, and how long have you been riding bmx bikes for?

Jeremy Deme, 27 years young, a little over 10 years

How long have you been making videos for and how many titles have you made?

I’ve been filming and editing for about 5 years now, I’ve made 4 actual “films” up to now.

For the camera nerds out there, what is your present video and editing setup?

Right now I’m filming with a Panasonic DVX100b, editing wise I use final cut pro on my Imac.

The filmer being filmed. Wallride over the rail.

You are working on a new video. How can people expect it to differ from the last one, and what riders and/or format can people expect?

Last year’s video was definitely our best one to date, riding wise, and filming wise. I am really happy on how it came out. The only thing that kind of bummed me out is that when you watched the dvd, you get a good feel for each persons riding in their parts, but you don’t get a feel for the session that went down the day each clip was filmed. I think the credits and intro did a good job of showing how much fun we had filming the vid last summer but this year I want to try and have that feel throughout the whole movie. I’m not 100% set on how were going to achieve that but were going to try something different along with individual parts to give that feel to it.

Trailer for the newest video in production, You Know What Time It Is?

You know time it is? from Presence Bmx on Vimeo.

Presence had distribution across Canada, and you even had it selling through US mailorders. That along with web edits and heavy promotion seemed to make it reach a larger audience then most scene videos. How do you think it was received by the majority of watchers, and do you think that creates any expectations for your new video?

We were fortunate to have the opportunity to have the video available through ten pack distribution this year in Canada, and Empire BMX in the U.S.. That was really a great thing for us because we wanted to have the vid easily available across Canada for anyone who shares our interest in what is going on BMX wise in our country. We didn’t expect to sell that many with web vids being how they are nowadays, and we didn’t sell very many either, but just knowing that anyone who wanted to get their hands on a copy at their local shops in Canada could do so was a good feeling.

Audience wise, I’m pretty sure that more people saw the parts we put online within an hour than people who saw the actual DVD in the 6 months of it being released. It kind of sucks that less and less people are supporting actual DVDs because in the end we are only hurting ourselves. I remember 5-10 years ago, a killer video was coming out every couple of months, getting together with friends to watch them and getting stoked to ride. Those videos stuck with you for years after too. Nowadays there are still awesome movies coming out on DVD but way less than before because of web stuff. I think web vids are good and have their place in BMX, but I also think that we need to support the dvds that do come out so that they can keep coming out.

Jeremy’s part from Yesterday.

Jeremy Deme Presence Part 2008 from Presence Bmx on Vimeo.

Ten Pack Distribution brought you along on their Eastern Canadian tour to film and do some video work for them. How did that come about, and overall how was that experience?

I filmed a few web edits over the winter, one being the Dillon Lloyd edit. He was shredding so much that we filmed a crazy solid part in 3 or 4 sessions. I sent the part to Macneil and started talking to Jay from there. Jay invited Dill, myself and Greg on the eastern trip of their tour and we were stoked to go on it.

I was really excited to film the tour, filming a bunch of different dudes at a bunch of spots I’ve never really been to or filmed at before sounded really fun. It was an awesome experience, alot of good riding went down and it was awesome to meet all those dudes.

Taking a look at the ledge with Lil’ Dill.

You also did a little bit of video work for the new Fit video with Luke Santucci when he came out to the Montreal area. How did that come about, and is being a contributing filmer something you want to do more of?

Haha that’s kind of a funny story. Luke just wanted to visit Montreal and ride while he was here, nothing was planned footy wise really. I doubt anything we filmed in Montreal will be used in the fit video but it was an awesome couple of weeks anyway. Luke was pretty beat up a couple of days after getting to Montreal, which is another story altogether haha. He pretty much rode hurt the entire two weeks he was here. We still filmed some sick stuff most of which will be in this year’s Presence vid.

I’d love to contribute filming wise. I’m always down to film dudes, I love it. I’m definitely a big fan of dvds and have always been super into any kind of film project. I’ve been wanting to do a Canada wide vid for what feels like forever now and it’s just never happened but I don’t think I’ll ever stop wanting to do that until it actually gets done.

This is a pretty cliché question to ask any filmer (as I had asked Rich the same thing back when I interviewed him) but when you come upon a spot with a group, what is your first reaction: angles and ways you can film other people, or your own personal riding? How do you balance the two activities?

This is the hardest part of the filming/riding life I think. Years ago I’d roll up to a spot, start riding it and thinking of stuff to do on it instantly. Nowadays, I roll up to a spot and start thinking of what the crew of dudes I’m with will likely do there and what the best way to film them will be. I still think of stuff that I would like to do there as well, but being the filmer means filming till everyone has done what they want to do and then riding your bike if we haven’t gotten kicked out yet. I think it’s a choice really, nobody forces anyone to buy a camera or to film, it’s something you want to do, for me getting home and watching a few really good clips feels almost as good as pulling something good on my bike. It’s weird but it’s true. Plus I can usually go back to the spot and ride it anyway.

Feeble to hard 180.

You used to be pretty regular on the amateur contest scene a few years back. I can recall many a large fufanu done by you followed by some pretty respectable contest placings. You’ve long since ditched the brakes, and if your video parts are any indication, primarily ride street. Why the change and/or what made you stop riding contests?

I’m definitely psyched looking back at my past years of riding. I think that after I finished in the top 10 at metro jam in 2005, I was done with contests. At that contest I took 4 pisses in a 4-5 minute time frame before both of my runs. I was seriously walking out of the bathroom, getting half way to the course and going back because I had to piss again, I was that nervous. I love going to contests and watching them, but the nerves got to me. I look back to that comp as one of the highlights of my riding so it was well worth it.

One thing about Montreal is that we’ve never really had any decent parks (until UAB) so we always had to ride street. Albert and I dug and rode trails for the first 3-4 years I was in Montreal, when they got plowed we started riding street a bit more. We had put so much work into the trails that starting from scratch was hard. We did end up digging some trails again but they weren’t and aren’t as good as the old ones. There’s a lot of good street in Montreal too so riding around the city with friends, hitting up a lot of different spots has been fun for the last few summers. I think that one thing that hasn’t changed since the day I started riding a bmx is that it’s always been fun. I’ll ride anything really, so long as I’m outside on my bike with some friends having fun, that’s all that matters. I know that years from now I will look back on trips and days of riding as some of the best times of my life and that’s what makes bmx so amazing, the times, places and people make bmx what it is.

I know you have an affinity for places in the North East (Maine, Boston, etc.) for riding, and just in general. What is it that keeps attracting you to that area?

I love the ocean. My parents have been bringing my brothers and I to Maine since we were kids. It feels like a second home to me, I love it out there. Boston is an amazing city, it has everything really. We had an amazing trip there this summer.

True or false, at one point you had a stash of GT padded dropnose seats that Chris Campbell outted you on

I don’t remember Scatman outting me on that one but I definitely had a stash of Gt dropnose seats. Back in the day I was pretty much only riding trails and everyone was riding primo hemeroid seats. I really wasnt into that seat, it was heavy and felt huge on my bike. GT had just stopped making dropnoses and I was certain I would run those until the day I stopped riding so every time I saw one for sale Id buy it or order it to stock up. I think I had 5 at one point, today I have none left. I wish I still had one, I wouldn’t ride it but it would be a nice souvenir.

Classic old photo of Jeremy with brakes, doing an fufanu, with a GT dropnose seat.  Photo by Chris Campbell.

Your videos have spotlighted up and coming talent from your area, and been a major key in creating the beginnings of careers for a few riders. How does it feel knowing the potential your work has for certain riders, and the people it is reaching?

It’s really an amazing feeling. These guys shred so much that it’s bound to happen sooner or later but seeing your friends get the recognition they deserve is amazing.

You have been a pretty central part of the greater Montreal area BMX scene for a long time now, always involved with videos, premieres, jams, etc. I know you have some pretty big major life changes in progress right now. Do you care to elaborate on what you have going on, and the future that holds for your videos and video work in general?

As of November 1st I will be working for Ten Pack out of Vancouver. I’ve lived in Montreal the past 10 years and grew up near there so it’s a huge change for me. Everyone at Ten pack is amazing and having the opportunity to work there was something I couldn’t pass up. I will and already do miss the east.

As for video stuff, I’m going to be focusing most of my out of work hours on editing “You know time it is”. I’d like to have that done at the latest spring 2010. I’d really love to do a Canada wide movie, if I ever had the chance to do it I’d love to. Ive been filming a bit in Vancouver already so I’m real stoked on that. Take it as it comes I guess.

Why do riders in Montreal like wearing shoelaces on their head so much?

Greg Flag bitch

What advice would you give to someone who wanted to make a video and pursue filming in BMX?

Life is short, if filming and editing your friends on their bikes is fun for you, do it.

Any last words or people to thank?

You know time it is??????

presencebmx.com
tenpackbmx.com

I’m not sure when it happened, I’m not sure at which point Satan crawled out of hell and atrophied the trapezoidal muscles of every trendy BMX kid out there making it impossible to do anything with their arms but droop them down below their knees but it has left a lasting nightmare in my subconscious. Dangly and nasty, those jetting wrists stab punching me in the soul with every shitty extension.

GROSS

No handers are meant to go UP.  Defy gravity; extend those skinny masturbatory wrists to the heavens in hopes that your extension will attract the gaze of an ovulating female and you will someday produce children who wont kill you for being a ‘donkey kong’ no handering sissy.

PROPER

Doing a Donkey Kong is really the equivalent of doing a Toboggan where you don’t grab the seat, or a turndown where you don’t extend your legs, or a barspin where your bars don’t turn at all, or a tailwhip where instead of going biking at all that day you sat at home and fingered your asshole in the shower while your dad watched.

THIS GUY MAKES YOU LOOK HANDICAPPED

I often hear the argument that it is okay to go downwards, or ‘knuckle walk’ in a 360. Fuck that. If Hoffman can get his arms out mid 900, you can get your cock grabbing hands in the air for a 3.

“What about down stair sets?” you might be asking. To that all I have to say is, if you don’t have time to extend them properly, keep your choda massaging palms on the grips. Find a bigger stair set, or get faster in your snap. Spend some time on the monkey bars. Quit making everyone wish that your chain would snap each time you drop in and end everyone’s misery.

I may have strong opinions. But I assure you that they are in your best interests. Just like when your Mom told you it wasn’t good for you to sleep in bed with her anymore when you turned 12 because you might end up sexually fantasizing about her, I’m telling you that throwing a couple of Kongs down at the skatepark could have the same consequences. Every time you throw those hands down, you’re coming closer to wrapping your lips around your mom’s clitdick. Why do you think your dad sleeps on the couch so much?

Join me. Each time you see a kid in tight iPod coloured jeans throw those knuckles down, make sure he knows how wrong he is. Its not wrong to point and laugh, or make puking noises or even issue a slight beating. If we don’t turn this trend around, first thing you know, we’ll all be riding mountain bikes and eating our mom’s clitdicks for breakfast every morning.

Thats not a world I want to live in.

Entry #1 from Jamie Dean, an elegant Brandon in a field. The least gay of the entries somehow…

This one is mine… Action Brandon.

This is another Jamie Dean entry…

And finally, Rich’s entry. Dude did it in paint. Great job. haha.